


Asgard and Engineers

by AnneElliot



Category: Norse Mythology
Genre: Asgard, Community: wip_amnesty, Engineers, F/M, Humor, Sagas, Unfinished, WiP Amnesty:2014
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-29
Updated: 2014-05-29
Packaged: 2018-01-27 00:22:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1708061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnneElliot/pseuds/AnneElliot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Moms are boring, right?  Until you find out that Mom's boyfriend is Loki?  And she hangs out with Thor?  And went to Asgard on vacation?  Why didn't she tell us?  And why do WE have to make the hard decisions?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sarah

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is based on the Norse myths and does not follow Marvel. So, for example, Loki is Odin's blood brother, not Thor's brother.  
> This fic got started when I wondered how someone like Loki (who I really identify with) could suddenly turn so evil as he did in the death of Balder. Once I'd written that part, I got curious about what happened next.  
> It's definitely not finished. It's not even a rough draft. I put together a timeline but I haven't gone back and made sure that the events fit or even really edited it at all.  
>  I'm debating whether I should finish it or not. More thoughts on that at the end.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that phone calls before 7:00 am are never good news.  I almost didn’t pick up when my phone rang at 6:52, but when I saw it was my brother Adam, I grabbed it.

 “Hey, dude, what’s up?  Don’t you know it’s crazy time around here?” was my perhaps not totally gracious greeting.

 “Sorry, Sis.  I got a call from Mr. Johnson.  Mom’s lawyer?  He’s insisting on meeting us this morning at her house.  Says there’s something we have to take care of today,” he informed me, sounding way too awake for such an early hour.

 “Seriously? I thought he was supposed to take of everything.  Mom said we wouldn’t have to deal with anything.”

 “I know but he’s really insistent in that annoying lawyer way where he tells you what you have to do but won’t give any logical reason.”

 “Hey, you’re a lawyer.”

 “Hence I recognize that annoying lawyer way.  After all my practice on you, lawyering is easy.  Neener, neener.”

 Seriously, my brother is NEVER going to grow up.

 “Can’t you deal with it? Lowlife to lowlife?”

 “Excuse me?”

 “Fine, little brother.  Upstanding Attorney to Upstanding Attorney.”

 He paused.  “Seriously, Sarah, I think we better go.  He sounds like it’s really serious and needs both of us.  I don’t know what it is – do you think something’s happened to Mom?”

 “Surely not.  Wouldn’t the consulate or someone call us?”  There was a thud and a scream from upstairs.  “I really have to go, Adam.  I could be there at 9?”

 “OK.  I’ll tell him.”

 I dashed upstairs to find that Susan had knocked her backpack off the bed. Open, of course, so everything was on the floor, which explained the scream.  The third day of school and we hadn’t exactly gotten the routine down yet.  But we got Susan and Derek out to the bus stop just as the bus pulled up.  I came back to the kitchen in time to kiss Rob good-bye.  I had a few minutes before I had to leave to meet Adam and the lawyer, so I hosed down the kitchen as quickly as I could, then dashed for the car.

 It’s about an hour’s drive to my mom’s house.  When I left, it was a lovely fall day, but as I got closer to her house, the sky darkened.  It looked like there was a thundercloud practically over her house.  By the time I got there, it was raining hard.  I pulled into the driveway beside Adam’s car.  A strange black BMW was sitting at curb.  Probably the lawyer’s.  Adam was just getting out of his car.  We dashed for the porch together.  As we got climbed the steps, a middle-aged man opened the door.  He was basically middle everything.  Middle-sized, middle-aged, middle-height.   He didn’t seem to have that larger than life personality I associate with litigators, so probably an office lawyer.  He greeted us somberly, ushered us in, and introduced us to a Fredrik Hansen.  Fredrik wasn’t middle anything.  He was tall – at least 6’4” – and muscular.  He had amazingly blue eyes and looked like he’d have a killer smile.  Unfortunately, he seemed somber.  Yes, I’m married, but I can still look and, honey, he was worth looking at.

 Mr. Johnson got us all seated, then began.  “I’m sorry to tell you that I have some bad news.  Your mother, Karen Miller, is, well, she has died.”

 “What?  What happened?”  Adam and I both jumped to our feet at the same time. 

 “I’m sorry, I only have limited information.  I received notification from the State Department.  Her body is in transit and should arrive at the funeral home tomorrow.  You have my sincere condolences.”

 I turned to Adam and wrapped my arms around him.  I’m not much of a crier, but I was suddenly shaking and cold.  He hugged me back but glared at Mr. Johnson.  “How is this possible?  I demand to know WHAT HAPPENED.”

 I pulled out my cell and texted Rob. “I need you.  Mom’s house NOW. Fine but Mom may not be.”

 Mr. Johnson went on, amazingly calmly, “Your mother made provisions for this before she left.  She left you this letter and this packet.  My instructions are to give you the letter and packet, introduce you to Mr. Hansen, and leave.  Mr. Hansen may be able to answer more questions, but I have been instructed not to wait for that.  Your mother made arrangements for her funeral before she left.  Here is my card.  Please call me and we will set a date for the funeral.  I am so sorry for your loss.”

  Adam grabbed the letter from his hands and ripped it open.  I reached for the packet and his card.  The packet was labeled “Open only in the presence of Fredrik Hansen or William Olsen. No one else.”

 Adam was reading the letter. It was only one page. He swore under his breath and handed it to me.  It was short and blunt.

  

Dear Adam and Sarah,

 I’m so sorry.  If you’re reading this, it means I’m dead.  I don’t really expect that to happen, but you know my philosophy:  If I’m prepared, it won’t happen.  If I don’t prepare, it will. 

I have left this letter and instructions with my lawyer, Mr. Johnson. He should have introduced you to either Fredrik Hansen or William Olsen, or both.  If anything goes wrong, which I don’t expect, they will let him know and he will get this letter to you and make any arrangements.  He has my will and power of attorney.  He knows to introduce you to Fredrik and/or William, and then he is to leave.  He doesn't know where I actually am and it will be best for all of us if he never finds out.  When he is gone, please open the larger packet.  Between it and Fredrick or William, it should answer most of your questions. They’ve promised to answer any questions you have but WAIT till Mr. Johnson is gone.

 After you've read the packet, Mr. Johnson can help with all the funeral arrangements.  I love you so much and I’m so sorry. 

_Mom_

 I stared at Adam.  What the hell?  Was Mom a spy or something?  He looked as disoriented as I felt.  Mr. Johnson cleared his throat.  “I must go.  Please feel free to call me at any time.”  He exited, rather stiffly.

 As soon as the door shut behind him, I ripped open the packet.  There was a stack of papers clipped together and on top, another letter.

 Dear Adam and Sarah,

 If you’re reading this, things have not gone according to plan.  I’m hoping that I’ll be reading this and laughing, but I don’t want to just disappear without letting you know what’s happened.  I have wondered whether to tell you this before I left, but it’s hard to believe. I’m not proud of some of it.  I have decided to tell you when I get back but this letter is just a fail-safe.

 I’m not actually on an eco-tourism trip where there’s no phone or internet access.  So where am I?  Well, that’s a little complicated.  In order to explain, you need to know a few things that I didn’t tell you over the years.  I’m a little sorry about that, too, but kids don’t need to know everything their mom gets up to when they’re at dad’s.

Remember all the times we read Norse myths or watched Avengers and agreed never to trust Loki?  It turns out that Asgard is a real place, Thor and Loki are real people, but the sagas aren’t exactly true.  Fredrick Hansen is Thor.  William Olsen is Loki.  I’ve been friends with them for over 20 years. 

I probably should have introduced you, but at first I was afraid I’d completely lose custody. Once you were adults, I should have told you, but it’s not the easiest thing to bring up in conversation.  I’ve left you my old diaries to fill you in.  If nothing else, I’ll do everything I can to make it home because having you read the diaries will be so embarrassing.  I’m sorry this is so long, but I hope you understand a little better now.  I’ve decided that I will tell you when I get back.  Be sure to remind me to tell you the story of Jubilee Lake.

So, where did I go?  Last March, Loki asked me to take the summer and spend a year or so in Asgard. We might visit some of the other realms as well.  He pointed out that you were both done with college, employed, and happy.  No new grandchildren are expected this year.  It’s a perfect time for me to take off.  So, after all these years, I’ve decided to trust Loki.  How can I say no?  We always said if The Doctor came, we would go.  This is my chance.

You know I’m not good at the mushy stuff, but if I had a heart attack or something, I want you to know that I love you so much and I’m so proud of you.  You are really cool people that I’m glad to know and I’m humbled by the fact that I’m your mom.  We got through so much together and whatever comes up, you can handle it.  The only regret I would have is not having more time with you, but you don’t need me now and I’m so proud of that.

But I’ll tell you all that in person when I get back.  As well as introduce you to Loki.  Never trust him in the little things – but he’s reliable when it counts.  Remember, if you pay attention when you meet him, you’ll know him always after that, regardless of his shape.  If you’re not sure what I mean by that it should be clear when you read the diaries.  (Loki still doesn’t know how I always know him so I don’t want to write it down here.)  And know that Thor is a terrible liar, which is handy if you’re not sure what’s going on.  LLAP!

All my love,

_Mom_

 

I turned and stared at Adam, who was reading over my shoulder.  He looked as shocked as I felt.  What the fuck?  Who were these men?  And Mom had been friends with them for 20 YEARS?  Adam recovered first and headed for Mr. Fredrickson. 

“You expect us to believe that you’re Thor? From Asgard?”, he roared.

“At your service,” replied Thor.  I guess I’m supposed to call him that now?

Adam grabbed him by the shirt.  Since Thor had at least 6 inches and 60 pounds on him, it didn’t look nearly as threatening as he probably thought it did.  “WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO MY MOM?”

Thor raised both hands in a gesture of surrender.  “I swear to you, I loved your mother as a sister.  I did not harm her.  I was merely too late to save her.  I will tell you the whole story, but first let’s drink to her memory.”

I grabbed Adam.  The last thing we needed was for him to pick a fight when he was so clearly outclassed.  “Adam, please.  Let’s listen, then we can decide what to do.”  He was trembling.  I thought for a moment he would punch Thor, but suddenly he turned and wrapped his arms around me.  He shook for a long moment like he used to when we were kids hiding from dad.  Slowly, his breathing came under control and he lifted his head.  “Fine,” he said carefully.  “Tell us the story.  I don’t drink and neither does Mom so there won’t be any booze in the house.”

Thor gave us a half smile.  “Traditionally, you drink the deceased’s favorite drink.  Is there no Mountain Dew in the house?”

Adam and I exchanged startled glances.  Maybe he really did know Mom.

Thor ushered us into the kitchen and seated us at the table.  The refrigerator had been emptied and unplugged and stood open in the corner, but Thor opened the pantry and removed a can of Mountain Dew.  Then he went to the cupboard and removed 3 goblets.  He certainly knew his way around Mom’s kitchen.  He poured us each a drink and sat at the table with us.  He stared at the drink for a moment, then lifted his head and met my eyes.  “I apologize for the rain,” he said. “When I am this sad, my control slips.” 

“You’re making it rain?” said Adam, skeptically.

Thor turned to him.  “Yes.”

Adam waved his hands impatiently. “OK, fine, I stipulate you believe that.  Can we get on with it?”

Thor sighed and raised his glass.  “To Karen, the finest mortal I ever knew.”

I raised my glass, “To Mom.”

Adam glared at both of us, raised his glass, but remained silent.  We all drank.  Warm Mountain Dew isn’t exactly a treat, but the taste brought Mom back so strongly that tears stung my eyes.  I blinked rapidly, then jumped as Thor threw his goblet against the wall.  The shards of glass shattered across the floor.  I stared and then jumped again as Adam threw his goblet as well. Why not?  I threw mine.  The smash was satisfying.

Thor made a face.  “I don’t understand the appeal of Mountain Dew,” he admitted.  That makes two of us, actually. 

He sighed.  “So,” he began.  “I am so sorry for your loss.  Your mother spoke of you often and with much love.”

“Well, she never mentioned YOU,” pointed out Adam. “How do we know you aren’t just con men?”

“We are not after your mother’s money or your inheritance.  Your mother’s attorney will make sure of that.  But I can tell you how she died.”

“Wait a minute,” I put in.  “Where’s Loki?  She said she was traveling with him.”

Thor suddenly looked older. “Loki is in the Healer’s House.  He is still unconscious.  He was gravely injured in the same incident that killed your mother.  The healers think he will survive but when he finds your mother is dead, I fear he will not want to live.”

Adam looked puzzled, then shocked.  “Wait, are you saying they were … were, lovers?”

“Yes.  She has been his only woman for many years.  She said she left you her diaries so you can learn the story.  But let me tell you what happened after she left Midgard, Earth, I mean.”

Adam and I exchanged another puzzled look.  I always wondered why Mom never dated after she divorced Dad. I just assumed after Dad, she’d never want another man.  But dating an alien?  How is that even possible?

Thor apparently took our shock for assent to tell the story. His voice was low and shaky.  He kept stopping to regain control.  Either he was a great actor or he was heartbroken, too.

“Loki brought your mother to Asgard.  They spent almost a year in the city, mostly talking to the artificers, the healers, and the magicians.  Because of the help your mother had provided over the years, Loki got Odin to give permission to show her everything.  Your mother and Loki shared an interest in magic and artificers.  Your mother had begun to talk about returning to Midgard, but first, she wanted to explore the other realms.  She and Loki were taking short trips to all the realms that are at peace with Asgard, spending a week or two on each one before returning to Asgard.  There is a world that lies between Asgard and Svartálfaheimr.  It has been claimed by both us.  In the truce after the last war, it was named neutral ground.  It’s primarily savanna-type ground and not much use to anyone so few people go there and no one lives there full time.  The bilgesnipe pretty much have the place to themselves.”

“Wait,” I interrupted.   “Bilgesnipe like in the Avengers?”

“Yes,” he replied. “Big, scaly, antlers.  They trample everything in their path.  The young warriors of both Svartálfaheimr and Asgard challenge each other to visit the world as a dare.  Occasionally, they will hunt bilgesnipe, but it is frowned on, for they serve no useful purpose.  Your mother and Loki visited this world.  Normally, it would not be a danger, but while they were there, two ** children were there.  The bilgesnipe stampeded.  Your mother had an emergency beacon.  She activated it and I responded with a squadron of guards.  We found the two children huddled against a cliff.  Loki was lying in front of them, severely gored and unconscious.  Your mother’s body and Loki’s sword were about 100 feet away, trampled.  The children had a hard time telling a coherent story.  As nearly as we can tell, your mother and Loki were watching the bilgesnipe from the cliff.  The children had snuck away from their nurses and followed their older brother and his friends to this world.  They didn’t want to get caught so they hid.  When they came out, their brother was gone.  They were wandering when your mother and Loki ran down to them, picked them up and carried them to the cliff.  They got there just before the bilgesnipe.  The herd was stampeding around the cliff. Your mother held them against the cliff and protected them with her body so they couldn’t see much.  As near as we can tell, Loki was holding off the herd with his sword.  He wasn’t fighting them, just steering them away.  Almost the entire herd had passed when they heard a horrible sound and Loki screamed.  Your mother told them to stay put.  She jumped up and grabbed Loki’s sword.  She stood over his body and screamed and tried to keep the bilgesnipe away.  They thought all of them had passed, but the last one got past the sword, impaled her on his antlers and threw her into the stampede.  She was trampled, instantly, but she had kept Loki and the children safe.  She truly died a hero’s death as a mighty warrior.”

I felt sick.  I gripped the table in an effort to stay absolutely still and not vomit everywhere.  Beside me, Adam had his head between his hands like it might fly off and was muttering, “Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck” under his breath.

Thor took a deep breath and continued.  “I wish I did not have to burden you with further considerations at this time.  But this is more complicated than a simple accident.  Loki is Odin’s blood brother.   Your mother was his mate and was under the protection of the royal family.  The children…. are a prince and princess of Svartálfaheimr.  Under our law, by causing the death of your mother, they should be executed.  By burning.  The king of Svartálfaheimr has offered, instead of turning his children over to be burned, full diplomatic relations and trade between our realms.  If we accept, there will be peace.  If we try to execute the children, there will be war.  Under our law, the family of the dead person must agree.  So it is up to you – peace or war.”

I stared at him in horror.  “Where are the children now?  Do you have them locked up waiting for us to decide?”

Thor recoiled.  “Nay.  They are with their mother.  We are not monsters.  But if you choose execution, we will send an army to retrieve them.  The ** will fight.  Your mother made many friends in her time in Asgard.  There will be no lack of volunteers for the army.”

That’s it.  This was officially TOO MUCH.  When I woke up this morning, my biggest worry was getting the kids to school on time and making some contacts to drum up business.  Now, my mother’s dead, on another planet, which means aliens exist, and I have to decide whether two planets that I’m not sure even exist are going to war?  How is this possible?  I must be hallucinating.  Or dreaming.  This cannot be happening.  I sat totally still, trying to figure out how to wake up.

Adam had the opposite reaction.  He jumped to his feet.  “OK, Thor or Fredrick or whoever you are, let assume for the sake of argument that you’re telling the truth.  Are you seriously asking me whether I want those responsible for my mother’s death to escape justice?  Of course not.”

I put my hand on his arm.  “Adam, the bilgesnipe killed Mom.  You can’t blame the children.”

He shook me off and turned to me.  I don’t remember ever seeing him so angry.  “Or so they want us to believe.  No one really knows what happened except for those children.  Do you seriously think they are telling the whole truth?  Probably their brother fought Loki and raped Mom and just used the bilgesnipe to cover it up.”  He turned to Thor.  “Let them burn.  Let them ALL  burn.  Let Svartálfaheimr and Asgard go down in flames together.”


	2. Karen's Diary Package

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the package Karen gave the kids - not the whole diary!

Karen’s Diaries:

In order to explain my decision, I’m going to share some of my old diaries.  Please don’t skip ahead – you need the background.  This all started in the summer of 2007 – the first time you spent a couple weeks with your dad after the divorce.

 

_July 7, 2007_

_I said I would keep an honest journal, so I need to write down what happened last night.  Either I’ve completely lost my mind or the coolest thing EVER happened to me.  I don’t think I’ll be sharing this with my counselor anytime soon – at least if I don’t want a 48 hour mandatory psych evaluation!  My counselor said “Write down what happened, then how you feel about it.” So here goes._

_Yesterday afternoon was one of those humid summer days when the air is heavy, the tension builds and everyone is praying for a thunderstorm to break the mood.  I’d been reading Muir and feeling a horrible blend of missing the kids and relief at having time to myself. The weather report called for rain and I decided to head up to the knoll.  I wasn’t going to climb a tree in a thunderstorm like Muir did, but I couldn’t resist the temptation to feel the rain on my bare skin and escape from the bills and drudgery.  I grabbed my old water proof daypack and a serape to sit on._

_I got to the clearing about an hour before sunset.  It was just starting to rain, warm drops that just barely kissed my skin.  The air was so humid and the rain so warm that I could hardly feel the water drops.  Todd and I used to come up here.  Adam was conceived here.  A long time ago.  I wanted to feel the rain so I shucked off my clothes and put them in the pack.  I lay on the serape and watched the horizon disappear behind the thunder cloud as the rain fell harder and harder.  I started to understand why Muir would climb a tree. It was invigorating.  I forgot my job and my bills and my heartache.  I actually got off my butt and started “dancing”.  Not that I can dance – it was more spinning and jumping and I don’t know what.  The lightning and thunder came closer until a lightning strike was so close, it lit up the clearing.    The thunder was ringing in my ears – so I was sure I imagined hearing someone say, “Milady, your prayers are answered.” But I instinctively twirled and about had a heart attack!  A huge guy had invaded MY clearing.  Oh, and I was naked!  I grabbed the serape and wrapped it around me.  “What the hell are you doing here?” I yelled.  “This is private property.”  He looked puzzled.  “I am not Hel.  I am Thor.  You are the only lady welcoming me among all those in Midgard.”_

_“You’re Thor.  Right.” (I so need to figure out a sarcasm font for this journal.  How can it be a realistic journal if I can’t indicate sarcasm?  Oh, well, since I’m the only one reading it, guess I’ll just have to remember.) “Yeah, yeah, great costume and normally I love cosplay but take it to the convention.”_

_It really was a great costume.  He was tall, buff for a cosplayer, and a lot older than most fans.  He looked like he’d just retired from the Army in his mid-forties and was ready to take on a second career as king or something.  Not sure why I thought army except for the short hair and general air of alertness.  His costume looked handmade and worn and he was carrying a pretty decent version of Mjölnir.  He was even wearing gauntlets.  In short, he looked like the last person I expected to see in the middle of nowhere in a summer thunderstorm._

_He looked even more puzzled.  “Costume? Cosplay? Convention?  I do not understand you.  Did you not call me here with the ancient rites to couple with you and perhaps bear the child of Thor?”_

_“I most certainly did NOT call you here.  And just because I was enjoying the weather on my OWN property does NOT give you permission to rape me.”_

_“Milady, I would never hurt you.  I am a protector of all Midgard.  I only come to those who truly want me.”_

_Honestly, he had the lamest lines!  I don’t know why I didn’t feel particularly threatened by him though.  At first, I thought I would just keep him talking until I could distract him enough to run but then I was intrigued.  He really was good at staying in character.  I’d get hand cramps if I wrote out our whole conversation, but after about 20 minutes of arguing we established that:_

  *          _He was convinced he was Thor, the god of Thunder_
  *          _I did not believe there’s such a thing as the god of Thunder_
  *          _When pressed, he admitted he was actually from the planet Asgard but seemed surprised that I was OK with aliens but not thunder gods_
  *          _He claimed he had landed right where I first saw him from the rainbow bridge_
  *          _There were no footprints but mine in the mud all around clearing and the paths leading to the clearing_
  *          _He had no idea how the rainbow bridge worked because “that’s for magicians or you would call them engineers”_
  *          _Since I was an engineer, he was willing to stipulate that engineers are wonderful and necessary but he still didn’t know how the rainbow bridge worked_
  *          _Yes there are 9 planets that are connected by the world tree.  He didn’t know why there were only 9.  Or what exactly the world tree was. (He did not seem to really understand the question.  I established in my own mind that he was not all that bright, but for once I was tactful enough not to ask him to confirm that!)_
  *          _No he didn’t make his “costume”.  The dwarves made the armor and the sewing women made the rest. (Yeah, right!)_
  *          _He didn’t have long hair because no “true warrior” would.  Too easy for an enemy to grab onto during a fight and you can’t tuck up under the helmet because it would mess up the fit_
  *          _He thought it had been about 100 years since he was last on Midgard and maybe things had changed a bit.  Not many believed in the “old ways” the last time he was here.  That’s why he was so excited to see me “worshipping”._
  *          _No, he understood now that I wasn’t worshipping him, but since we were both here….._
  *          _Yes, his pick-up lines were horrible, but he was out of practice in trying to pick up women who didn’t think he was a god._



_So, he either was an alien who used some sort of interstellar transport he didn’t understand in order to get laid or he was completely bonkers yet curiously able to move with incredible stealth.  Everyone tells you not to trust your first impression, but if he really wanted to murder me, he could have hit me with the hammer about a dozen times.  He was at least 6’4” and incredibly fit.  I couldn’t think of a way to stop him if he attacked, although I strongly suspected that if I just said “go”, he might.  After arguing for 10 minutes.  And, I haven’t had sex in 3 YEARS!!!  So, I did what I’d always fantasized about doing if I ever met Thor.  I said, “So prove you’re really Thor.  Take me flying.”_

_His face lit up. He started twirling Mjölnir in his right hand.  With his left arm he lifted me off my feet and held me to his chest.  (I know!  I’m not exactly a lightweight any more).  He chuckled (have I mentioned his deep voice!!) “Hang on Karen” and we were rising!  Just like that! Over the trees and up and up!  It was GLORIOUS.  I thought gliders were great but this…. I can’t describe it.  It was better than the flying you do in dreams because I could feel the rain and wind on my face.  We rose through the thunderstorm until we broke through the clouds into the last rays of sunshine.  Then he hovered us there.  I whispered “how does this work?  Why aren’t we covered in ice?”  He chuckled again.  “You’d have to ask Loki.  But don’t think now, just look.”  We watched the storm move on over the hill and the sun sink halfway down behind the horizon.  He brought us down, and landed gently right where we had been standing.  “Well,” he said, “Do you believe me now?”  What could I say?  I looked into his yummy blue eyes, threw my arms around his neck and stuck my tongue down his throat.  That, he understood.  He dropped his hammer, _

Ok, you need to know the background but not the details.  No kid really wants to hear this about their mom.  I strongly suggest if you find my diary you just burn it.  Suffice it to say, yes, we did it.  He gave me a gorgeous Viking cloak pin/brooch sort of thing and disappeared back into the sky.  I felt a little guilty because I didn’t really feel guilty but the whole experience seemed like a dream.  I assumed this would be a one-time fling and then I would have my clearing and my mundane life back.  But that wasn’t quite the end.  Here’s another bit from the diary:

_July 9, 2007_

_So I’m probably losing my mind.  Here’s what happened:  I was working at home today. I’d gotten up at 6 and worked pretty much straight through till 1:30.  I was stiff and hungry so I decided to take a lunch up to the knoll.  It’s been dry since the thunderstorm so the ground wouldn’t be soggy anymore.  My clearing was quiet again, although I blushed when I first saw it._

_But today the clearing was peaceful.  I was just finishing my lunch when I heard a quiet nicker.  I’d never seen horses anywhere around here. But a lovely black stallion came slowly into the clearing and approached me slowly.  He didn’t look wild, but he wasn’t wearing a halter.  I stood up and offered him my apple core.  He ate it with no sign of fear and then nudged me to rub his head.  I hadn’t seen such a tame horse since my grandfather’s horse Glitter.  I rubbed his nose and slid my arm around his neck. He stood calmly.  He had an interesting scent.  He smelled of horse but also faintly of musk, allspice, and cinnamon. “Who are you, boy?” I murmured.  “Where do you belong?”_

_“Well I was born on Jotunheim, but I live on Asgard.  You know the sagas, who am I?” The HORSE replied!!!!  I just about jumped out of my skin.  I looked around for a ventriloquist and as I did so, the horse became a tall, dark haired man.  I don’t know how he did it, it happened so fast.  I was standing there with my arm around a horse and then I had my arms around the waist of a man.  I jumped back. _

_“Loki??” He burst into laughter.  He had an incredibly compelling laugh.  Even as the butt of the joke, I almost joined in._

_“I knew you’d figure it out.  Thor’s women are always passionate, but I’ve never seen one as witty as you.”_

_“How the fuck do you know about that?”_

_“Don’t be angry.”  Uh-oh.  Any time a guy says that he’s done something unforgiveable._

_“What!”_

_“Looking after Thor is part of my responsibilities.  So when he shot down to Midgard for the first time in a century, I needed to make sure he wasn’t going to land us in a war.  So I followed and when you and he met, I was…. watching.”_

_I really must be insane because I hauled off and slapped him.  I connected pretty well, even though he is also tall.  He was just as yummy looking as Thor, but in a completely different way.  He looked thin and quick where Thor was muscular.  More like a Morgan than a Clydesdale. He had longish black hair and brilliant green eyes.  He sat down._

_“Ow!  I guess I deserved that. I really didn’t stay once I realized that you weren’t going to call the cops.  But I thought you might have questions.  Thor means well but isn’t exactly a good source of information.”_

_“Really.  You took time off your busy peeping tom schedule to answer questions.”_

_“Well, I also wanted to talk to the woman who is an engineer and who,” he burst into laughter.  He was laughing so hard he could hardly get out “who, who, who made Thor wear, wear, a condom.”_

_I smacked him again.  “You said you left.”_

_“I left right after that, honest.  You should be glad I stuck around.  Who do you think went and grabbed a condom and stuck it in your daypack when you first started talking about it?”_

_I had wondered how I’d managed to forget a condom in my daypack for at least 5 years._

_“Why would you do that?”_

_“My dear, I’m the god of mischief.  Why do you think I did it?  I thought it would be amusing and it was.”_

_By this time, I was laughing too and collapsed on the ground beside him.  “I thought he was going to have a stroke by the time I managed to tell him what it was and what he had to do with it.  I’m not sure he ever understood why.”_

_“So you’ve figured out that Thor’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer.”_

_“Well, yes.  But how do you know about condoms and how to get them when he acted like he had never heard of them?”_

_“It’s my job.  Thor’s in charge of fighting, I’m in charge of intelligence.  I keep tabs on the current culture and technology on all of the 9 realms.  And I’m assuming what you know about Asgard comes from the sagas, so I’m thinking that you need some more accurate information.”_

_“Except everything I know agrees – don’t trust Loki.  So how can I believe you?”_

_“First, the sagas are FICTION.  We are not gods, which I think you already know.  So let me prove I can be trusted.  Will you at least listen for a few minutes?” he asked._

_“Oh, I spend all day listening to people I don’t trust.  Feel free.”_

_“OK, first.  Did Thor give you a brooch?”_

_“Actually, yes. So?”_

_“Did he explain it?”_

_“What’s to explain?  It’s decoration, right?”_

_He chuckled.  “I didn’t think that bit of lore had been passed down. Thor still thinks all mothers tell their daughters about his brooches while dad’s out.  It used to be every woman knew what it was. And wanted one.”_

_“What is it – a tracking device?”_

_“Actually, no.  It’s a communication device.” He showed me how the brooch would signal if Thor wanted to visit._

_I stared at him.  “So you have instantaneous interstellar communication and you use it for booty calls?”_

_“Yes,” he retorted.  “And you invented the internet and what do you use it for?”_

_I laughed. “Touché.”   I pulled out the brooch and turned it over in my hands.   (Of course, I was carrying it around me.  It might be proof I wasn’t hallucinating.)  It really just looked like a large brooch.  “So what’s the battery life on this thing?” I asked._

_“Cynical, aren’t you?  It lasts about 6 months, but Thor can recharge it, if he wants to.”_

_“I bet he doesn’t want to very often,” I replied._

_He studied me warily.  Apparently deciding I wasn’t going to go into hysterics, he replied, almost gently, “Not usually.  Constancy isn’t one of his virtues.  The sagas are fiction, but there are elements of fact.”_

_“Yes, so tell me about that.  You’re from another planet, but you visited before and inspired the sagas, is that it?”_

_“More or less,” he admitted.  “We’ve had dealings with Midgard.  It is under our protection.”_

_“So are you essentially immortal?  I don’t remember exactly, but the sagas were from, oh, a while back.”_

_“Not immortal.  Difficult to kill, certainly.  Our typical life span is about 900 of your years.”_

_“So, when you travel here, you travel in time and space, is that it?  Because if you only live 900 years, you wouldn’t still be here.”_

_“Very good.  Yes, we control when as well as where we come to Earth.”_

_“So how old are you, if that isn’t too personal of a question?”_

_“I’m 345, about 300 in your years.  Or in your terms, early middle aged – like you.”_

_“That’s polite of you to say so, but in terms of % of lifespan, sounds like I’m older than you.  Thor said you were a magician?”_

_“That’s pretty much a hobby, but yes.  There isn’t much call for magicians any more.  Of course, for magician, you would say engineer or scientist.”_

_“Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic,” I murmured._

_“Yes, you’ve read Clarke.”_

_“Well, duh.  So why isn’t there a call for magicians anymore?  Engineering’s always needed.”_

_“Not always.  What do you remember about Valhalla?”_

_“It’s Asgardian paradise.  Basically, fighting, feasting and fucking forever.  And isn’t there an option for farming?”_

_He chuckled.  “Yeah, that pretty much sums it up.  Well, guess what most people do in Asgard?”_

_“I see.”_

_“Thor’s a good example.  He’s not really stupid, just not interested in anything other than fighting, feasting and fucking, as you so eloquently put it.  He’s actually quite good in those areas.”_

_“I can see that…..” I admitted.  “So why don’t they want engineers?”_

_“Engineers make improvements.  But why do you need improvements in Paradise?”_

_“But, but,” I sputtered.  “Don’t they want to know how things work, why they work, can’t they see that things could still be better??”_

_“No.” He said flatly.  “They don’t.  They aren’t interested.  They chalk up it up to “magic” and don’t really care.  Why are there only 9 realms connected by the world tree?  Could we reach other worlds?  Can we travel freely without the Bifrost?  No one wonders or cares.”_

_I stared at him again. “So that’s it.  You’re bored.  That’s why all the mischief and causing trouble.  You’re like me.”_

_He raised an eyebrow.  “I do more than cause trouble.  Remember the sagas are fiction.”_

_“I’m sure you’re responsible most of the time.  But come on, you can only listen to people going on about the latest fights and the latest weapons and who’s shagging whom for so long before you have to do something!  Here, it’s the latest reality TV shows and shopping and who’s shagging whom.  Boring!”_

_He paused, looked awkward, and said, “I must go.  It was a pleasure to talk to you.  Don’t be surprised if the brooch lights up.” He stood up, dusted himself off, turned ¾ of a turn and disappeared._

_Good job, Karen.  See, even alien guys aren’t interested in conversation.  I’m still struggling to believe all this._

 

That was my introduction to Thor and Loki.  Thor and I never did hook up again.  He was actually rather sweet, but as Loki said, he had very few interests only some of which I really shared.  Loki, on the other hand, stopped in regularly to talk.  Apparently he wasn’t offended or he got over it. He said he needed to keep up on pop culture.  He often came disguised as an animal or another person.  As soon as he got close enough, I could always tell it was Loki.  He could never figure out how I knew before he spoke.  I still didn’t trust him, so I was careful never to say out loud or write down how I knew.  Since you read the diary entry, you’ve probably figured it out.  Remember it – you may need it.

Oddly, we had really open conversations.  I figured since he was either the head of an interstellar intelligence agency or a Fight Club-type hallucination, trying to keep secrets was a waste of time.  He talked openly about his research.  I asked him if Asgard had a Prime Directive, but he said telling an individual wouldn’t do much – it takes a society to put new technology in place. Which is true – I know how Mjölnir works now but there’s no way I could duplicate it on Earth.

 But I was pretty sure he couldn’t read my mind.  Of course, if he was a figment of my imagination, he would have access to everything in my mind, but that hypothesis was getting weaker.  About 6 months later, I concluded that Loki and Thor were real. 

 

_January 15, 2007_

_I think Loki and Thor are undisputedly real.  I thought knowing that would make me feel better, but now, I’m not so sure.  The implications are a little scary.  I better write down what happened so I can get it straight in my head._

_I was in DC for a conference.  I arranged to stay an extra day and play tourist.  The morning after my conference, I was having breakfast in my hotel before heading out when I saw Loki!!!  He was part of a breakfast meeting with about 6 other men, all dressed in their power suits. He, of course, was in an expensive tailored suit and looked like a million bucks.  I was sure it was him.  I walked past his table to the restroom to confirm it and it WAS.  He wasn’t there for me, in fact when he saw me, he looked surprised for just an instant.  The men at his table clearly saw him and talked to him just like he was another consultant out of the millions in DC.  As their meeting was breaking up, he excused himself and came by my table.  _

_“Karen Miller?,” he inquired politely, holding out his hand to shake.  “You may not remember, I’m William Olsen.  We met at a conference a few years back.”  His eyes were lit up with mischief._

_I shook his hand.  “How could I forget you?  Have a seat and tell me what you’re up to these days.”_

_“Oh, I really can’t.  I have an all morning meeting at the Pentagon.  But I have the afternoon free, could we get together?”_

_I studied him warily.  “Sure, let’s meet at the entrance to the National Archives at 1:30.”_

_“Great.  See you then.”  And he rejoined his group._

_I didn’t know what to do. Loki’s real and going to the PENTAGON.  He says Earth is under his protection, but one thing the sagas make clear – Loki lies.  But what could I do?  Walking up to the Pentagon and telling them their consultant William Olsen (if that was even the name he was going by) was really an alien from Asgard that people had worshiped as a god was not likely to end well.  I decided that the best thing to do was to go on with my plans._

_I love the National Archive.  I figured if Loki met me there, fine.  If not, well, worst case I’d call in Thor and grill him.  Thor is a terrible liar._

_When I got to the National Archive, Loki was waiting._

_“So, you didn’t try to turn me in.” he said._

_“Nope.  You probably have a higher security clearance than I do.” I replied._

_“I do.  But I wasn’t sure you’d realize that.  I bet you’re wondering why I’m here.”_

_“No, Loki, I think it’s pretty obvious.  And it’s not like I could believe you anyway.  So I’m going to look at the Magna Carta.  You can come or not.”_

_He followed me in. I could look at the Magna Carta for hours.  Fortunately, the Archive was practically empty so I didn’t feel rushed.  Loki stood beside me.  “Should we steal it?” he eventually murmured._

_“How do I know you haven’t already?  I’m sure you could with no problem. You told me you monitor the internet, you’ve obviously infiltrated our intelligence agencies and military.  You might as well help yourself to whatever you want.”_

_He sighed.  “That was a joke.  You really don’t trust me, do you?  Yes, in order to properly protect Midgard, I have to work with your intelligence and military services.  And no, they aren’t ready to believe that I’m from another planet, so I work as a consultant.  I know this won’t mean much, but I swear to you that I mean no harm to your planet.  I’m not here to loot it.”_

_“Well, truth is the daughter of time, isn’t it?  I guess I’ll find out.  But you know what?  I’ve spent all morning thinking about this and there isn’t anything I could do about it.  So let’s not fight.  I bet you know DC better than I do.  Let’s just play tourist.”_

_“Well, in that case,” he replied, “You know they don’t call it DC here – they say Washington.”_

_“Yes, but I’m from the real Washington and I’m not that worried about fitting in.  Have you been to the Library of Congress lately?”_

_So we had a great time exploring DC.  We kept the mischief to a minimum.  Turns out someone with his clearance could get us into all kinds of cool “employees only” areas.  He offered to drop me at home and save me the plane ride, but I figured that would be hard to explain when I turned in my travel expenses on the trip.  So now, I’m on the plane home trying to figure out what to do.   If Loki is on our side, I don’t need to do anything.  But if he isn’t and I’m one of the few people in the world who know who he is and what he’s capable of, what should I do? What am I responsible for? And what am I capable of?  I’m thinking of a plan that might do a little.  If he is on our side, I don’t want to get in the way of that.  But I’m not writing any more about it.  Loki, if you’re reading this, I want trust you but you know a good engineer plans for all cases, amateurs plan only for what they hope is true._

 

I still have a hard time putting this all down on paper.  For so many years, I’ve tried to keep this absolutely secret.  I realize that what I’ve shared so far makes Loki seem totally reasonable but that’s only one side of him.  For example, here’s the story of the last time I saw Thor at the clearing.

_June 18, 2009_

_I’m really struggling to decide whether I should take the new job and move.  I can’t make pro and con lists forever.  I have to decide.  So, I took today off work and decided to go up to the clearing and think.  Well, that worked out about as well as my plans usually do.  When I got near the clearing, I heard voices.  No one ever comes up there, so I crept up behind a tree and peeked out.  Thor was there with a woman, which pissed me off.  I didn’t expect that I was his only woman, but I didn’t think he was rude enough to bring another woman to MY clearing.  But then he shifted slightly and I saw that the woman was ME.  Instantly, I knew what was going on.  I stormed across the clearing.  They were so intent on each other, they didn’t hear me coming.  I heard “my” voice in the most sickening tone, “But Thor, I missed you.  Have you forgotten me?”_

_I shoved “me” to turn “her” to face me and slapped “her” across the face.  “How dare you imitate me?” I howled. “And with such bad dialogue???”  (Yes, I know, pot, kettle.  But you try to come up with good lines at a time like that.)_

_Thor’s jaw dropped.  “Karen?  But who’s this?”_

_“Who do you think it is?  Loki, you slime bucket.  What were you thinking?”_

_Loki, still in my body (well not my actual body, but you know what I mean) was doubled up with laughter._

_Thor grabbed for his brooch.  Sure enough, the gem that corresponded to mine was glowing green.  “These are unhackable.  Karen, do you still have yours?”_

_I pulled mine out of my pocket and showed it to him.  It was not glowing at all. Obviously, no one had used it in awhile._

_“Loki,” he growled._

_“I figured out how to hack them and I wanted to see if it worked.  Guess it does.”_

_Thor began to whirl Mjölnir.  Loki, sensing trouble, waved his hand and suddenly there were 20 versions of me running around the clearing._

_Lightning flashed from Mjölnir and took out a tree on the edge of the clearing.  “Stand still so I can kill you,” he roared._

_“Hey,” I smacked him on the arm.  “Watch out for my trees!  And me, I didn’t do anything.”_

_“Sorry, Karen but I CAN’T TELL WHICH ONE IS REALLY LOKI.”  He looked like he was about to have a stroke from frustration._

_“You can’t?” I was shocked.  I could figure it out in one visit, but Thor hadn’t been able to figure it out in his whole life? “Right there.”  I pointed.  They both froze and turned to me._

_“You can tell?” they said, almost in unison.  Loki resumed his usual form and the rest of the Karens disappeared._

_“Of course I can.  And so could you if you thought about it.  Now take your fight away from my clearing!”_

_Loki recovered first and floated into the air.  “As you wish….” floated back down as he slowly faded. I’d never seen him do that before, but apparently he was taunting Thor, who roared in anger, lifted Mjölnir and flew up and disappeared in the same spot._

_The clearing was silent.  I was suddenly glad that I hadn’t had two sons.  I wondered briefly if I needed to worry that Thor would actually harm Loki, but decided it was unlikely and there wasn’t anything I could do about it, anyway._

_I pulled my blanket from my pack and spread it out in my favorite thinking spot.  I lay down and watched the clouds form and change.  What would it be like not to be able to come up here?  Was it worth it?_

_Less than 15 minutes later, Loki wandered up the trail and stopped at the edge of the clearing.  “Truce?” he called.  “May I come offer my apologies?”_

_“If you promise to go when you’ve worn out your welcome,” I replied, a little ungraciously._

_“I really am sorry.  I thought you would be at work today.  I never dreamed you would see that.”_

_“So, you’re sorry you got caught?”_

_“Well, yes.” he admitted a little sheepishly. “Actually, from my point of view it worked out better than I had planned, but I didn’t want you to get hurt.”_

_“Better than you planned?  What were you trying to accomplish that makes that scene better?”_

_“Well, remember making sure Thor is in top fighting condition is one of my responsibilities.”_

_“I know that, but I really don’t think I would be a good test of his fighting abilities so I don’t see the point of impersonating me.”_

_“Ah, that’s where you don’t understand the subtleties of the plan.  Thor trains all the time against warriors who are part of his army. They work him hard but they don’t dare anger him.  He needs to learn to fight when he’s angry. So, my job is to make him angry and let him try to kill me.”_

_“What?  That’s just stupid. What if he succeeds?  That’s certainly not going to help your military preparedness.”_

_“Oh, he won’t succeed.  I lured him into a herd of bilgesnipe.  He’ll spend the next few hours fighting his way out of that.  By then, he’ll have forgotten what he was so mad about and head home for a feast.  By tomorrow, we’ll be laughing about this.  We do it all the time.”_

_“You’re both crazy! But wait. If I wasn’t supposed to turn up, how were you going to make him mad?”_

_He chuckled.  (Have I mentioned how delicious his laugh is?  I swear, if he didn’t have that deep voice and that delicious laugh, he’d only get away with a fraction of what he does).  “Ah, that was the best part.”  He pulled out a condom.  In large letters, it said “Extra small.”_

_I couldn’t help it. I laughed.  “They don’t even make such a thing!”_

_“I know that and you know that, but I doubt Thor does.”_

_“Pretty sure that would have worked.” I admitted._

_“Yes, but this was better.  I was feeling a little guilty about ending your…trysts with Thor. But you and he were done, right?” he asked in an odd tone._

_“Yes, we were done after the first time, actually.  And you’re right, I’m pretty sure if he doesn’t know if it’s me or you, that’s probably a deal breaker.”_

_He studied my face.  “Are you OK with that?  The more I think about it, that was pretty creepy.”_

_I thought about it.  Oddly, I mostly felt relief.  “You’re right, it was pretty creepy.  It’s not interfering between me and Thor that upsets me as much as you impersonating me.  I don’t want an evil twin running around doing who knows what and getting me arrested or worse. You are NOT authorized to steal my identity.  Animals, imaginary people, whatever. But swear you will not impersonate me again.”_

_He took my hands and said, very formally, “I hereby swear that I, Loki, will not impersonate you, Karen Miller, unless it is necessary to save your life.”  He leaned over and kissed my hands, one at a time, then released my hands and smiled in an obvious effort to change the mood._

_“So, can I hide out here this afternoon?  Probably shouldn’t go home for awhile.”_

_“Only if you’re willing to listen to me think out loud.  I have to decide something important.”_

_Oddly enough, he turned out to be a great sounding board.  Three hours later, as I headed home, I had decided to take the job._

 

Well, and obviously you know what happened.  I took the job and we moved, but it took several months before we got everything worked out.  That was a complicated time, to say the least.  I snuck off to the clearing as often as I could.  Here are a couple more diary entries.

 

_July 31, 2009_

_I headed up to the clearing early this morning to clear my head.  In the morning, it was cool and clear – just the kinds of days I love in Western Washington.  I’d barely gotten to the clearing when Loki strolled up – in his own form – no tricks today.  He joined me on the blanket._

_“Hey, how’s it going?” I asked._

_“Well,” he said. “It’s the oddest thing.  The US military has a new black program working to revive the Texas particle accelerator/detector in order to develop a new early warning system for quantum-based technology of the kind the Svartálfar and Jötnar use.”_

_“Better not say any more.” I said. “Remember, I don’t have a security clearance – I can’t be listening to this.”_

_“Oh, call it hypothetical if you want.  I assure you, no one else has this clearing bugged.”_

_“Ha, so you admit you have this clearing bugged?”_

_“Don’t change the subject.  I want to know how you did it.”_

_“How I did what?  What could I possibly have to do with some black budget military program?”_

_“I know what you did.  You convinced the head scientist, who was at college with you, that the post 9-11 hysteria was the perfect way to get his research program funded.  And you happened to convince him to focus on the Jotenheim technology because, if I am secretly allied with them and using Midgard as a base, it will make it harder to keep the alliance a secret from Asgard, but if I truly am protecting Midgard, it will make it easier.  It’s a most elegant solution.”_

_“Sounds great.  But what does it have to do with me?  I’m just a mid-level STATE bureaucrat with no military responsibilities whatsoever.”_

_“YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON ON EARTH WHO KNOWS ENOUGH OF OUR TECHNOLOGY TO MAKE IT HAPPEN.!!!!!”  (Yes, it was all caps)_

_I laughed.  I never dreamed I would see Loki at a loss._

_“How did you do it?” he begged.  “The only link I can find is that the head scientist went to college with you and you were both in San Diego in March of 2007.”_

_“So Jeff wrangled the head position, did he?  Sounds like he’s your clever person.  Did you ask him how he got the idea?”_

_“Yes!  He claims he thought of it himself.  ‘An obvious outgrowth of the work at CERN’, he says.  Which is total bullshit. How did you do it????”_

_“Well…… if there’s one skill every professional woman needs,” I pointed out, “it’s making a man think something is his idea.”_

_“That’s it? You just ‘made him think it was his idea?’”_

_“Hypothetically, wasn’t that enough?”_

_He stared at me, then shook his head and laughed. “Oh, it was definitely enough.  I don’t think I’ve ever seen a better operation. It was completely untraceable.”_

_“And yet here you are, thinking you traced it.”_

_“No, I didn’t trace it.  I just had special knowledge that allowed me to see who it had it be.  You’re smiling.  You don’t care if I know. And  you’re right, it doesn’t matter.  Who could I tell? Very good, Karen.  I think I underestimated you.”_

_“The middle-aged woman’s greatest weapon.  Everyone underestimates us.  Plus, all I have to do is put on polyester and I’m invisible.”_

_“Why aren’t you running Midgard?”_

_“Just like Larry, I gave up on wanting to conquer the world when I realized the prize would be…the world.”_

_“Sure you won’t take a job with me?  I need someone like you.”_

_“No thanks.  I have enough trouble getting the court to give permission for me to move 200 miles.  Can you imagine if I tried to move to Asgard?”_

_“Pity.  Maybe you can just advise me.”_

_This seemed like the perfect time to get some answers.  “Loki,” I began. “You keep telling me the sagas are fiction, but based in fact.”_

_“That’s true.”_

_“So what are the facts behind the death of Baldur?”_

_“Is that what’s bothering you? Why you don’t trust me?”_

_“Would you trust you based on that story?”_

_“Fair enough.  OK, here’s the story.  I keep telling you that the sagas are fiction.  What I haven’t told you is who wrote them.  Actually, I wrote most of them.”_

_“You? Why?”_

_“Long ago, when I was a young man, just barely an adult, Asgard was at war with Jotenheim.  Like all good young men, Thor and I wanted to do our part in the war effort, cause it sounded a lot more exciting than school.  Odin didn’t want us to endanger anyone, so he assigned us to a complete backwater, where he didn’t expect any action at all.”_

_“Let me guess, Midgard.”_

_“Exactly. Thor was the leader of a squad and I was responsible for propaganda.  When we arrived, we discovered that Jotenheim was surveying Midgard for mining operations.  Part of the reason for the war was their desire for more metals – Jotenheim has very few metals.  But their mining methods are incredibly destructive.  They had only a small garrison, based in Denmark.  We were told to make friends with the humans, watch the frost giants, slow them down if possible, but not start any major actions.  Well, when we first made contact with the humans, Thor started showing off and of course, they thought he was a god.  He had just received Mjölnir and couldn’t resist playing with it constantly. So, since I was in charge of propaganda, this seemed like a great idea.  I started writing sagas about Thor and Odin, designed to make the humans willing to fight on our side.  We had a couple of surveillance drones, which I turned into the ravens, Thought and Memory.  Even then, I was into practical jokes, so it was natural to cast me as the god of mischief.  I made occasional appearances as Loki, but spent most of the time as a bard, sharing the new sagas._

_Well, as wars tend to do, things got a little out of hand.  Several of the meteorite craters geologists have found are actually left over from that war.  The humans did fight with us – bravely.  We held the frost giants to a standstill, but the war was finally settled by finding asteroids for them to mine and by treaty.  Odin really did lose an eye in the battles – but not here on Midgard.  He did have to come here for a few battles._

_But over the 20 years we were here, only about 1 was taken up with actual fighting. So, I spent a lot of time coming up with elaborate tales to keep them interested.  And yes, some of them undoubtedly owe a lot to the quality of the mead they had.  Of course, they have changed over the years, but the general plots of the stories have stayed remarkably close to the stories we came up with.”_

_“So that explains why some of them sound like a drunken game of ‘Can you top this.’”_

_“Exactly.  When the war ended and the frost giants went back to Jotenheim, Odin and his advisors were concerned that the peace might not last.  They wanted to be sure that all the Nine Realms would unite, if necessary, to prevent the frost giants from destroying more worlds.  So, Odin asked me to make sure that every part of the world had a legend of a returning hero that everyone should follow.  If the war broke out again, we could quickly raise an army if needed.  Obviously, among the Norse, Thor and Odin were the gods they would follow.  I thought that the stories needed a villain.”_

_“What? Why? Wouldn’t it be better to leave the villain vague so that if there was a war, you can fit who ever the enemy is into the slot?”_

_He sighed.  “Have I said, I was young and stupid?  You should have heard my father when he heard the stories of the death of Baldur and Ragnarok.  He wasn’t nearly as polite as you were in pointing out the stupidity.”_

_“So why did you put out the story? And why make yourself the villain?”_

_“I thought I knew what I was doing so I put out the sagas before anyone from Asgard heard them.  As far as why me for the villain,” he paused.  “I guess I didn’t want to make anyone mad by making them the bad guy.  And Loki, as described in the sagas, seemed the obvious choice.  Mischief and evil sometimes aren’t that far apart.  And, well, I wasn’t proud of what I did in the war.”_

_He wouldn’t meet my eyes at that point.  I asked, “So what did Baldur think of the story?”_

_“There’s no such person as Baldur – you notice he isn’t in any of the stories before that.  He just appears to make me look bad.  They knew Thor and me as brothers and friends.  We had to make something bad enough that it would make sense that we would never be on the same side again.  But, as you pointed out, the whole ‘have a specific bad guy’ concept probably wasn’t a good idea.  We dropped the idea after the Norse.  Thor and I spent a couple of years touring around and planting the idea of a returning hero to raise an army.  Usually, we based it on a local hero but planted the idea of a return.”_

_“What, like King Arthur? What’d you do, have Thor running around waving a sword you told everyone was Excalibur?”_

_He grinned.  “More or less.  King Arthur, the yellow emperor, Quetzalcoatl…”_

_I giggled.  “Oh, please tell me you made Thor dress up as Quetzalcoatl.”_

_“Yep, that one was after he lost a bet.  But later, we just put the story around and didn’t try to impersonate anymore.  Some were more successful than others.”_

_“Wait, the marble king?  Constantine XI Palaiologos?”_

_“You’ve heard of him?”_

_“Heard of him? I’ve had a crush on him for years.  Did you know him? Is he like you would expect?”_

_He surveyed me with a puzzled look on his face.  “You never cease to amaze me.  Sorry, I never met him, but when I heard the story of how he died, I took the liberty of adding in the same old ‘he’ll be back someday’ plot. That was one of the last ones that we did.  Odin decided it wasn’t necessary anymore.”_

_“So you’re not responsible for Dr. Who?”_

_“I wish, but no.”_

_He was quiet, watching for my reaction.  I smiled at him, and said lightly, “Maybe a villain wasn’t such a bad idea after all.  The stories of Odin, Thor and Loki have survived in a lot more detail than most of the returning hero stories.   Hardly anyone knows about the yellow emperor or the marble king anymore, but you guys are still showing up in the comics and fiction.”_

_“Kind of you to say so, but I don’t know.” he replied. “I think it’s that we spent so much more time on them and fleshed them out so much more.  Anyway, it doesn’t really matter anymore.”  He paused.  “Except to you and me, I guess.”_

_“Well, Baldur’s not here anyway.” I pointed out. “So what are you going to do about Jeff’s program?”_

_“Nothing.   I’ll support it if I’m asked, but if I get too involved, you’ll think I’m trying to manipulate it and probably start another – more secret one.  If I just leave it alone, it will increase the safety of the planet.  Since that’s what I want, it’s hands off.”_

_He’s so good at saying what I want to hear, it’s a little freaky.  I looked at my watch.  “I have to get busy.  We’re moving in 3 days and I have a million things to do.”_

_So, class, do we trust Loki now?  As far as I remembered, in the sagas before the death of Baldur, he was mischievous but always working for the good of Asgard.  His story fits together.  But the bone-deep conventional wisdom says “DON’T TRUST LOKI – ever”.  Loki, if you’re reading this, STOP IT.  I’m not writing down my decision._

_April 17, 2010_

_Today was the last time at the old house.  I came back for the closing.  I hate living in a small town.  I’m sure I’ll adjust but right now, it sucks.  Guess I’ll head up the clearing.  For some reason, I couldn’t bring myself to sell that piece of property.  I’ll probably see it once a year if I’m lucky, but I’ll know it’s here.……_

_Later,_

_Wow, much better mood.  Getting laid will do that, I guess.  I went up to mope in the clearing.  When I came through the trees, I saw Thor.  But as I got closer, I realized it was Loki pretending to be Thor.  I wanted to see what he was thinking, so I just headed towards him.  He came to meet and pulled me into his arms.  “Karen,” he murmured.  “I knew today would be hard for you.”  He leant down and kissed me.  Not a peck, a serious kiss.  When it ended, he looked at me as if he was trying to gauge my reaction._

_“Loki,” I said. “If you are trying to seduce me, shouldn’t you do it with your own face?”_

_His form blurred and turned into Loki, but he still held me tight.  “How did you know?” he demanded._

_“Must have been the look of intelligence in your eyes,” I retorted, a little sarcastically._

_“ Could I seduce you with my own face?” he asked, apparently taking my comment at face value._

_“Well, certainly more easily than pretending to be someone else,” I retorted._

_“I was afraid you didn’t trust me enough,” he muttered._

_“So you were trying to deceive me?  Hasn’t anyone ever explained to you that you don’t win people’s trust by tricking them?”_

_“Actually, most people win trust by tricks,” he retorted._

_“OK, I grant you that.  But it only works if you don’t get caught.”_

_“Well… what about it?”_

_I laughed.  “That’s your great seduction line? ‘What about it?’”_

_“Karen,” he started then paused.  “Karen,” he started again. “I think about you all the time. You are a woman who could be a true partner to me.  But you don’t trust me and if I try to use flowery words, you won’t believe it. I know you have a life and responsibilities, and so do I, but oh, I want this. Even if it’s just for today. but I really want us together as long as you’ll let me.”_

_OK,  I know I’m supposed to say what happened and then what I felt, but OHHHH!  That speech. in THAT voice.  “Well,” I said, “I’m not into bestiality so you need to stay yourself.  But I have to admit, that trick you have of copying yourself opens up some ….. intriguing possibilities.”_

_“Oh, it certainly does,” he purred. (Sorry, there’s no other word for it.)  He bent again to my lips and tightened his hands around my waist. Suddenly I felt another set of his hands running through my hair and he murmured into my ear, “Let Me Make You Smile In Bed.”_

_Note to self:  Do NOT laugh while kissing.  I nearly swallowed his tongue._

_I’m not going to try to describe what happened.  He certainly made me smile and yes, being able to copy himself was … useful I guess would be the best word.  But that wasn’t the main impression he left.  If I had to put Thor’s lovemaking in one word, it would be “expert.”  For Loki, surprisingly, it would be “tender” (though he’s certainly expert. and fun. and imaginative.)  Loki, if you’re reading this – you did surprise me._

 

 

Ok, so you get the idea.  It turns out that it _is_ possible to keep a secret lover in a small town if he’s a shape changer.  It’s weird to think that I’ve been hanging out with Loki off and on for 15 years.  We’ve had a lot of fun – Loki’s research on the world tree makes string theory look simple and obvious.  Thor and the Lady Sif got back together (turns out _that’s_ the universe’s longest on-again, off-again romance).  The four of us would go out in disguise, thanks to Loki, so I didn’t have to explain who they were.  We got kicked out of the theatre so many times, we finally had to wait for the DVD. 

 

 


	3. What Karen doesn't tell her kids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Random bits of Karen's diaries that she didn't include in the packet for her kids. Lots more thoughts for this part, but no time to write it yet.

_Undated section of Karen’s diary:_

_Nothing in the world is as aesthetically pleasing as an erect penis.  I completely understand the cultures that worship them.  I mean, the shape is perfect – a standard pattern with enough individual variation to make you want to check out a new one.  It appeals to all the senses. Visually, the shaft and head are in perfect balance.    The shape just calls out to be touched.  My palms just want to slide up and down that perfect shaft feeling the combination of the soft skin over steely rod. My fingers ache to run around the head, along the shaft, and across the slit.  My tongue wants to tease the slit, feel its softness, and taste the saltiness.  My mouth wants to swallow it whole.  My nose takes in that delicious man smell that makes me hungry for him.  My ears strain to hear the moans he can’t hold back as I worship his penis.  If it wasn’t for the aching need in my center, I would never let go long enough to let him enter me.  _

_Another day:_

_Nothing like dating a shape-shifter to destroy any notions of personal privacy. Locked door? Hah, he can change his fingers into the shape of the key.  In the shower?  Is that a new shower curtain or Loki?  Fortunately, I always know he’s in the room, but I’ve had to ban him from the house when the kids are here.  The worst fight we ever had was when the kids brought home a “stray cat” that was actually Loki._

**Author's Note:**

> So, thanks for wading through that. If you didn't actually read it, this contains spoilers.
> 
> I think I suck at dialogue and finishing this would be a good way to work on it. I have two thoughts and I'm not sure which to pursue. I have a lot of ideas for Karen's diary. The idea of dating a shapeshifter who's addicted to mischief and keeping it secret in a small town has a lot of possibilities, but they don't move the plot forward that much. But lots of lovely smut.
> 
> Adam and Sarah are completely disagreed about how to deal with the crisis caused by Karen's death. I see some possibilities there to explore conflict resolution both in family and planet scales. There's also grieving for someone who had a secret life. There's no way to work it through with Karen so how do the kids deal with that? How does Loki deal with his guilt and grief? Would he be on Adam's side or Sarah's? Then there is the bigger picture - does Asgard become known to the Earth at large?  
> I'm afraid this could get way out of hand, but it's a world I'm really enjoying and it's good practice, so make your case for me finishing it.


End file.
